While Angels Watch Are Keeping
by Regulus of Slytherin
Summary: James and Regulus spend the holidays at James’s house, and James muses about how he sees a Regulus that no one else does while watching Regulus sleep. JamesRegulus. Oneshot.


**A/N:** This is for the contest in the Harry Potter Slash Guild on Gaia. Write a Christmas scene with any couple of your choosing. Well…they asked for it. This isn't to Christmassy, but because of the nature of their relationship there is no other time they could do it anyway.

Also, for those who don't know the Greek myth I make reference to: Endymion was the mortal lover of the goddess of the moon, Selene. In order to keep her lover young and beautiful forever, Selene put him in an enchanted, eternal sleep.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own any of the characters. How sad.

**Summary:** James and Regulus spend the holidays at James's house, and James muses about how he sees a Regulus that no one else does. JamesRegulus. One-shot.

**Authoress:** Reggie

**Title:** While Angels Watch are Keeping

1/1

It was a risk we probably shouldn't have taken, but the temptation was too great. My parents were going out of the country for the holidays, and they said I could have the house to myself. I was overage after all, they decided I was responsible enough and they'd be back by New Years Eve.

It was easy enough to plan. Regulus told his parents he was staying at Hogwarts for the holidays to catch up on homework. He told his Slytherin friends he was going out of the country with his family and they wouldn't be able to contact him. I told my Gryffindor friends the same. We both got on the train, and when we got off at King's Cross there was no one there to meet us. We snuck away from the crowd, and I apparate us to my childhood home.

No one can find us here. We are surrounded on all sides by snowy fields, and a tall hedge surrounds our country manor itself. We are safe here.

I watch him sleeping now. We were up late last night, both decorating for Christmas and making love. I should be asleep with him, but I wouldn't miss this for the world. I get to see this so rarely. Most often our meetings are rushed moments of stolen time, after which we must leave as quickly as we can.

You miss out on so much when your relationship must be a secret from everyone.

I gently run my fingers through his black hair, which is scattered on the pillow. Though it looks a like, his hair is entirely unlike his brother's. Where Sirius's hair shines brightly, it is actually quite rough- and I have pulled it enough times to know that it has always been so. What Regulus's hair lacks in luster compared to his brother's, it makes up for in feel. The ebony strands slide through my fingers like a night breeze, and fall back like a shadow onto his forehead.

I let my eyes travel down, soaking in everything about my lover that the rush of life too often forces me to miss.

He looks relaxed in a way I've never seen him. The small creases of worry have been erased from his face, turning him back into the sixteen-year-old boy he is supposed to be. I can feel his soft breath escaping from his slightly parted lips. I long to kiss those lips again, but I don't. I want to do nothing that will disturb him.

I know he gets so little sleep as it is. His eyes tell me that when he passes me in the hall, pretending to not know me as he does. The mark that I know is on the arm pillowing his head makes sure that he can never let down his guard at school as he is doing now.

I do not want to think about that mark. I don't want to reawaken the feelings of horror and fury that come whenever I see it, black against otherwise perfectly white skin. Life is too short to dwell on that. That same mark that I shouldn't dwell on reminds me of this.

Should anyone find out about us, Regulus will die. Voldemort would probably try to kill me too, but I don't care. I'm not so important that if I escaped he would continue to hunt me. Regulus, and everything Regulus has been forced to become, is that important. Spending time with me is akin to signing his life away. He tells me he does not regret it.

If I lose him, I might.

My eyes drift lower, past his smooth chin and down to his throat. A different kind of mark is there, and I smile slightly at the contrast. Two marks, for two reasons, on two different people that are at once the same.

Sirius could never understand that. He refuses to admit that he could possibly be wrong about Regulus. He can't see what I do. The same boy, physically, but two different persona. The Regulus who took the mark is a mask for protection. Someone who isn't really quite real.

The Regulus who now lies sleeping in my arms is the one who hides behind that mask. A young boy, no longer a child but not quite yet a man, who didn't ask for the things life gave him. Who does nothing more than his best to survive from day to day.

The hand not stroking his hair reaches out and gently touches the love mark with my thumb. Regulus stirs, and I hold my breath, but he does not wake. He is too tired for my gentle touch to fully pull him from sleep.

I drop my hand from his throat, and allow it to ghost a long the torso I know so well. Every muscle, defined but not quite built, and every curve I recognize. Though I rarely get to bask in their perfection during our hurried lovemaking, I know them as well as my own. Each curve some kind of distorted mirror. A mirror that I know I shouldn't love as much as I do, but that I'm not sure I could live without anymore.

I let my hand come to rest on his waist where blanket and skin meet. The blanket is thin, though outside I am sure it is freezing. It snowed most of yesterday, clearing just at sunset. Curled up as we are, however, the cold cannot get us no matter how thin our protection.

I do not think I would mind if time stood still like this forever. If the world outside this bedroom simply disappeared. For a moment, as I watch his chest rise and fall with even breath, the gods seem to grant me my wish.

For just this moment, while he sleeps, there is no Dark Lord trying to tear the world apart. The world has not separated itself into good people and Death Eaters, and things in my life are not spiraling out of control in a tangle of loyalty.

While my Endymion sleeps, the horrors of the world will simply pass us by.

This works better for Selene than for me, however, as sunlight begins to snake its way through the closed curtains into my bedroom, illuminating the ghosts and toys of a past now far behind me.

Regulus stirs slightly, and I know he is waking. The magic of the moment is broken.

I lean forward and kiss his eyelid gently, calling him back fully into the land of the living.

His eyelashes part like lovers, and azure eyes stare into mine.

"Hey," he whispers, voice still thick with sleep.

"Hey yourself," I respond, smiling at him. He would be mortified if he knew I watched him sleep, ashamed to have shown such vulnerability to me. Afraid I would think him weak.

It is my secret, and one I shall treasure always.

He snuggles close to me, burying his face into my bare chest as much as possible. "Merry Christmas, Jay-Jay."

I hold him close, my hands sliding under the blanket slightly to clasp behind his back, and kiss the top of his head. "Merry Christmas, Cub."


End file.
